I want my grits!!

Well, this just sucks, life is no fair! My friend, John, used to make me grits for breakfast every morning - just the way I like them, with real butter and jam - and now he's moved away and no one will fix me my grits....and Mom won't let me use the microwave to do it myself. (Besides, I am Mad-Eye Louie, I shouldn't have to fix my own grits, that's what the two-leggers are for!)

Sigh....I really miss John....and not just for the grits.